Bible colledge

Did I forget to mention that I moved home? Home, being the place where I was born and raised. I was living in the city, I had a good job working with people who had developmental disabilities. I found out after a year of attempting to be what I considered 'independent,' that true independence is something that comes from one's soul,not one's circumstance. That seems like a simple enough conclusion, but it is not actually so easily made as one may assume. I was independent in every way, externally. I was doing what I wanted when I wanted to do it. I was earning my own money,living in my own house. . . but I was empty. Perhaps true independence is learning who we are, being comfortable with it, and embracing it. Once I did that, I was free to realize that I wanted to be on the farm, so I moved home. I was able to see that music and horseback riding are irreplacable loves of my life. I embraced the idea of accountability, realizing that it makes me like myself more. I no longer feel empty but fulfilled. I believe I have found my definition of independence.

So now I need to decide what step I want to take next. Further steps are always a dilema for me, because they involve planning, which breeds predictability. As we all know, I do not like predictability, but instead revel in the joys of a surprising day. In reality, however, predictability is somewhat important. So, do I want to go on to post secondary? Mmmm, perhaps; perhaps I want to go to bible colledge. I love music, and that would be a fantastic place to focus on music. Do I have too many wild roots in me to go to bible colledge without stirring up a little trouble? Yes, most likely. I have a firm faith in God, but I was raised rodeoing. I am not what anyone would brashly consider 'tame.' So, my dilema continues. My dear mother wants me to go to bible colledge. . . and really I would like to go to. My wonderful father encourages careful thought and wisdom before sinking money into something I may not use. I need to find out what is in the bottom of my heart, and go for it.

When I figure out what it is that I want to do, I will let you know.